When the Gallup organization started looking at employee engagement – basically, a euphemism for the degree to which people like their jobs or think they suck – they came up with a survey tool comprised of 12 questions. Question 10 went like this: “Do you have a best friend at work?”
And much of the corporate world went apeshit over this question.
Some execs felt the question was way too touchy-feely. Others thought it was irrelevant; we're here to get stuff done, not hold hands and sing Kumbaya together.
And some companies refused to participate in the research because – wait for it – they actually discouraged workplace friendships, viewing them as complications that get in the way of productivity and fairness.
And yet the question stayed, because, as it turned out, the answer was one of the biggest predictors of workplace engagement, productivity, and success. Those with a best friend at work felt more encouraged and supported, did more to encourage and support and develop others, and felt like their work was important.
Today's guest, Morag Barrett, along with her SkyeTeam colleagues and coauthors Ruby Vesely and Eric Spencer, understands the importance of having close and meaningful relations in the workplace. In their new book, You Me We, they turn Gallup's question upside down. Instead of inquiring about having a best friend at work, they invite you to ask: “Am I being a best friend at work?”
In other words, how are you showing up for your colleagues and teammates? Do they trust you? Do they feel that you have their back? Can they depend on you? Do they expect helpful candor and rigorous debate to assist their growth?
They've created a pinwheel of qualities of a workplace ally, and challenge all of us to assess ourselves to see where we're strong and where we're weak. Where we show up and where we back down. Where we connect and where we protect.
Here are the categories:
- Abundance & Generosity
- Connection & Compassion
- Courage & Vulnerability
- Candor & Debate
- Action & Accountability
In our conversation, Morag and I talk about what's required to create trusting workplaces where people feel safe enough to take risks and do great things together.
We talked about the limits of what an individual can do within the context of a toxic workplace, and how all of us can show up differently, even if there are systems in place designed to foster zero-sum competition rather than abundant generosity of spirit.
We explored how each of us can behave like a leader, going first and taking responsibility for changing our corner of the world, rather than waiting for “them” to fix things.
We looked at several powerful questions to ask ourselves on a regular basis, so that we can orient ourselves toward alliance rather than rivalry.
Enjoy!
Links
SkyeTeam
You Me We, by Barrett, Vesely, and Spencer
Ally Mindset Profile
“Community Game” vs “Stock Market Game” research
Dr Howie Jacobson
This podcast is a labor of love and a way to give back to the world that has given me so much. That's why there aren't any sponsors (except me :).
My day job is helping leaders and their teams master their mindsets to remove all obstacles to heart-centered high performance.
Here are three gigs that I do:
1. Executive and Senior Leadership Mentoring and Facilitation
I work with high performing executive teams in organizations — and executive teams that need to become high performing. My focus is mindset mastery, because it’s our mindsets that either support high performance or get in the way.
At this level, everyone’s got the skills and experience to excel and contribute at the highest level. What holds people back is mindset stuff: specifically the triggers that get them out of creative engagement and into fight-or-flight defensiveness.
My practice is all about teaching people to respond differently to those triggers by updating old maps — essentially removing the glitches that the triggers grab onto.
2. Executive Coaching: Quick Wins for High Performance
I work with individual executives and leaders, one on one. The program is called Quick Wins for High Performance, and what we do is, we work strategically on one or two areas that are holding you back and keeping you from performing at your best.
We reverse engineer the presenting problems — too much work and not enough time, underperforming employees and teams, maddening organizational inefficiencies, etc — and identify and rewire the suboptimal mindsets that are behind those problems.
The work is all about updating your mental maps so your actions and responses are always appropriate, proportionate, and strategic.
3. High Stakes Conversations for Fast Growing Small Business Teams
I help small business teams have high stakes conversations with skill, humor, and grace. When people feel safe, they can do their best, most creative, most collaborative work.
So that's what I do. If you'd like any of those results, drop me a line and tell me about yourself.
You CAN Change Other People!
Well, that's what Peter Bregman and I claim in our provocative book of that title.
What we really mean is, you can bring out the best in the people around you. If you think you're powerless to help people change, it's because you've been going about it the wrong way.
Discover our straightforward, replicable process here: You Can Change Other People.
Music
The Plant Yourself Podcast theme music, “Dance of Peace (Sabali Don),” is generously provided by Will Ridenour, a kora player from North Carolina who has trained with top Senegalese musicians.
It can be found on his first CD, titled Will Ridenour.
You can learn about Will, listen to more tracks, and buy music on his website, WillRidenour.com.
Gratitudes
Thanks to Plant Yourself podcast patrons – Kim Harrison – Lynn McLellan – Brittany Porter – Dominic Marro – Barbara Whitney – Tammy Black – Amy Good – Amanda Hatherly – Mary Jane Wheeler – Ellen Kennelly – Melissa Cobb – Rachel Behrens – Tina Scharf – Tina Ahern – Jen Vilkinofsky – David Byczek – Michele X – Elspeth Feldman – Leah Stolar – Allan Kristensen – Colleen Peck – Michele Landry – Jozina – Sara Durkacs – Kelly Cameron – Janet Selby – Claire Adams – Tom Fronczak – Jeannette Benham – Gila Lacerte – David Donohue – Blair Seibert – Doron Avizov – Gio and Carolyn Argentati – Jodi Friesner – Mischa Rosen – Michael Worobiec – AvIvA Lael – Alicia Lemus – Val Linnemann – Nick Harper – Bandana Chawla – Molly Levine – The Inscrutable Harry R – Susan Laverty the Panda Vegan – Craig Covic – Adam Scharf – Karen Bury – Heather Morgan – Nigel Davies – Marian Blum – Teresa Kopel – Julian Watkins – Brid O'Connell – Shannon Herschman – Linda Ayotte – Holm Hedegaard – Isa Tousignant – Connie Haneline – Erin Greer – Alicia Davis – Heather O'Connor – Carollynne Jensen – Sheri Orlekoski of Plant Powered for Health – Karen Smith – Scott Mirani – Karen and Joe Crabtree – Kirby Burton – Theresa Carrell – Kevin Macaulay – Elizabeth Rothschild – Ann Jesse – Sheryl Dwyer – Jenny Hazelton – Peter W Evans – Dennis Bird – Darby Kelly – Lori Fanney – Linnea Lundquist – Emily Iaconelli – Levi Wallach – Rosamonde McAtee – Dan Pokorney – Stephen Leinin – Patty DeMartino – Mike and Donna Kartz – Deanne Bishop – Bilberry Elf – Marjorie Lewis – Tricia Adams – Nancy Sheldon – Lindsey Bashore – Gunn Marit Hagen – Tracey Gulledge – Lara Hedin – Meg from Mamasezz – Stacey Stokes – Ben Savage – Michael K – David Hughes -Coni Rodgers – Claire England – Sally Robertson – Parham Ganchi – Amy Dailey – Brian Tourville – Mark Jeffrey Johnson – Josie Dempsey – Caryn Schmitt – Pamela Hayden – Emily Perryman – Allison Corbett – Richard Stone – Lauren Vaught of Edible Musings – Erin Hastey – Sean Owens – Sagar Naik – Erika Piedra – Danielle Roberts – Michael Leuchten – Sarah Johnson – Katharine Floyd – Meryl Fury – for your generous support of the podcast.
Disclosure
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